Articles Below:
2. From Devastation to a Positive Outlook One Breast Cancer Survivor’s Inspiring Story
3. MAMM - Disneyland in my Mind
...............................................................................................................................................

JULY/AUGUST 2003 –AMERICAN MAGAZINE

  

STORY OF A SURVIVOR 

BY NANCY MIKAELIAN MADEY

PHOTOGRAPH BY DIANE FRANZ

 

She was just getting used to motherhood when she was faced with a brand new challenge—one that would  change her life forever.

Five months after giving birth to our beautiful son David Tod, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I was only 35. My husband Randy and I had been married for two and a half years and had just become parents for the first time. Our lives with little David were merely beginning..

I’ve heard the phrase “Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” How true that is. I had plans to rock our baby in my arms, to walk to school with him on his first day of kindergarten, to teach him how to ride a bicycle and how to drive a car, to see him graduate from high school and college, to see him get married and one day rock his baby in my arms. Those were my plans.

Contracting breast cancer was one of the furthest things from my mind and one of the last things I could have ever imagined. I didn’t know how or why this could have happened, as I believed mammograms were not necessary for women under 40 years of age, unless there is a family history. Since I didn’t fit into either category, I never dreamed it could happen to me.

I clearly remember my gynecologist, Dr. Kraus, finding a lump in my breast during a routine examination after David was born. He speculated that the lump was a cyst or a clogged milk duct from breast-feeding but recommended that I have a mammogram just to be sure.

I wasn’t overly concerned about the lump in my breast or the doctor’s recommendation to have a mammogram. The words “breast cancer” didn’t enter the equation, so I didn’t worry. To my shock, I was diagnosed with a very aggressive form of cancer called ductal carcinoma in situ. I had a lumpectomy followed by seven weeks of radiation therapy on my right breast.

Sixteen months later, I had a follow up mammogram and appointment with Dr. Baick, the surgical oncologist. “I just finished reviewing your films and noticed that you have micro-calcifications on your left breast. Calcifications that didn’t appear on your last mammogram a year ago,” Dr. Baick said.

My heart sunk down to my stomach. I began to panic and shake. “What does that mean?” I asked with deep concern.

“Well, it could be that they are just normal calcifications. However, they weren’t present on your last mammogram. Since you’re considered a high-risk patient, it’s my job to determine exactly what it is,” he said. “We’ll have to surgically remove the tissue and get a biopsy.”

I started crying. “I can’t go through this again, Dr. Baick. I’ve been through so much!” I exclaimed. 

“There’s only a 20-percent chance it’s cancer, but I have to be sure. Come with me,” he said.

He escorted me to another room where my films were hanging up on a view box.

“This is your mammogram from last year, and this is your mammogram from today,” he said pointing to several tiny white dots. “These are what we believe to be microscopic calcifications. As you can see, they didn’t appear on your last mammogram.”

My hands and knees were shaking badly. Dr. Baick noticed how I was trembling, and he wrapped his arms around me and gave me a hug. “Please don’t worry until we know for sure. We see these types of things often, and they’re usually normal,” he said, as we slowly walked back into the examination room.

All I could think about was having to experience another episode of waiting for biopsy results. It wasn’t fair! I had already gone through enough turmoil. I just wanted the chaos to end.

I could see the concern in Randy’s eyes when I shared the news with him. However, he remained calm and continued to be my pillar of strength. “You’re going to be fine,” he said, grabbing my hand tightly and kissing me on the head.

The surgery went smoothly. However, meeting with Dr. Baick to discuss the results was quite painful.

“I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that it’s cancer.” Wham! “The good news is that it’s the same type of non-invasive cancer you had the first time: ductal carcinoma in situ. I didn’t expect this since the odds of this occurring to the opposite breast so quickly are minimal,” said Dr. Baick.

“What are her options now?” asked Randy.

“You could do radiation treatments or have the breast removed.” Double wham! I was stunned! HAVE THE BREAST REMOVED? I began crying even harder. I didn’t like either of the options, especially having my breast removed! My God! This can’t be happening!

“You don’t need to make a decision right now,” he said.

“If I were your daughter, what would you recommend?” I asked.

“Nancy, you’re young, and we all want you to live a long life. You may continue to have similar experiences of abnormalities from time to time throughout your life. I know you don’t wish to experience this again. Based upon these reasons, I don’t think it’s unreasonable for you to consider a double mastectomy.”

“A DOUBLE MASTECTOMY?!” I cried. “A minute ago I was just going to lose one breast and now I’m losing two?” The feeling of devastation was overwhelming.

“If you have both of them removed, you won’t have to worry about having a reoccurrence, and we do elegant reconstruction work.”

After I got past the initial shock, I realized this was a good point. Randy was very supportive of Dr. Baick’s suggestion to have a double mastectomy. And, the more I thought about it, I realized it was a small price to pay to ensure that I had a healthier future.

Although I’d be losing both breasts, I chose to focus on the fact that I was also losing the cancer. I didn’t bother to worry about what I was going to look like without breasts. I just wanted the cancer out of my body. I didn’t have the mental capacity to think about anything else. To make light of my experience, I told myself that I was having a breast augmentation, not a double mastectomy. It sounded better and made me feel as though as I had some control over the situation.

The entire reconstruction process took approximately one year to complete, but it was worth the wait. I feel like a new woman. I now wear tight clothes with plunging necklines. I feel wonderful. More confident. More feminine. I feel like I have the world at my fingertips. And I do—along with an entirely new appreciation for life and all of God’s beautiful gifts.

Those who know me have witnessed my ability to develop courage in times of desperation. They were amazed at my refusal to wallow in self-pity. I chose to face the fear instead of hiding from it, and I grew as a result. This tactic, combined with my faith in God, became my saving grace. Today my friends refer to me as a “warrior” and a “hero.” I think it’s a bit overstated, but I smile and thank them for the compliment.

Life. It does find ways to complete a circle, allowing us to move forward again. In April 2000, Randy and I received another blessing from God when we had our second child—a little girl. Our prayers were once again answered, and our lives continue to become enriched in ways we can only imagine.

I learned a lot about myself through this journey of life-altering decisions. I discovered that I have a strong network of family and friends who are reliable. I have seen my priorities change, and now I have a better understanding of what’s really important to me. Although I’m cancer-free, the experience has touched my life and become a part of who I am. It was a journey that I’ll never forget—a journey I feel privileged to have taken.

 

THE LEXINGTON EXPRESS NEWS

Serving the Missouri River Valley

October 26, 2006

From Devastation to a Positive Outlook
One Breast Cancer Survivor’s Inspiring Story

By Tonia Wright

Nancy Mikaelian Madey was 35 years old and a new mother to a five-month-old when she was diagnosed with breast cancer.  To say she was devastated does not scratch the surface.  Her world was turned up side down.  She decided to listen to her doctor, and not the advice of others who told her it was probably a clogged milk duct or cyst.

Madey underwent a lumpectomy and radiation to remove the cancer. Sixteen months later, Nancy and her husband wanted to have another child.  Before trying to get pregnant again, Nancy decided to have another mammogram. 

Don’t worry," Madey was told.  "The odds of your getting cancer again are less than .08 percent."   Sure enough, the results from Madey’s mammogram revealed she had breast cancer again.  "I decided to have a double mastectomy," Madey said.  "They could just remove both breasts and do reconstructive surgery.  I just wanted the cancer out of me."

On November 22, 2006, Madey will celebrate 10 years as a cancer survivor.  She gives much credit to those around her that loved and supported her through not just one, but two bouts with breast cancer. "I had a wonderful support system," she said.  It was faith, family and friends" in that order "that got me through."

Through it all, Madey said she understood she had absolutely no control over what was happening. "I tried not to question it.  I decided I was going to accept this.  I decided I was going to rise to the occasion and show everybody that I [could] do this.  I wasn’t going to have a pity party.  Instead, I was going to turn this around. I wanted them to talk about me in a positive light," she said.

When her friends would cry, Madey said she felt like she was succumbing to death.  "I find myself consoling my friends, ‘I’m going to beat this,’" she told them.

And she did.  The first six months after beating the disease Madey saw the world differently "the way God intended it, she said.  "I noticed the blue skies and the birds singing.  My senses were heightened and so in tune with the world around me.  I remember taking mental snapshots of my son while he was sleeping and cherishing every moment "everything I did, even the things I tasted.  It was a beautiful way to live my life," Madey said.  "But once you’ve beaten it, you fall back into the life you had before.  You just want your normalcy back.  You go on living.  After a while, I saw myself no different from anyone else accept that I had silicone in my breast."

But Madey’s bout with breast cancer did make one very significant difference in her life: Through this ordeal, she developed a spirit of strength and tenacity, traits that will enable her to persevere through whatever challenges life throws her way.

Once you’ve beaten breast cancer, you can handle anything that comes your way, no matter what it is "divorce, losing a job, the death of a loved one, anything.  It makes you stronger inside and out.  It gives you the tools to deal with what life hands you."

As for women who are currently struggling with the disease, Madey said learning to look at breast cancer in a more positive light will help them face their fear.  Madey stands by this so much that she wrote a book about it called Facing Fear.

The book plays on words to turn a devastating disease into positive ways to deal and cope with breast cancer.

When I had my breasts removed I told myself I was having breast augmentation," Madey said.  "I could pick out what size breast I wanted, I could finally have cleavage and I didn’t have to wear bras anymore...I decided to look at the positives.  When I looked at the before and after pictures, I told my husband they looked like true works of art.  ‘Look at me now!’ I said."

She also said it’s important for women battling breast cancer to have a positive support system and not to question God.  She said talking with her priest confirmed that God chose her for this disease so that she could help other women get through it, too.

There are so many women going through this," Madey said.  "It’s important for women to know they are not alone.  There are wonderful support groups out there, and because of the Internet, they have access to lots of information to help them get smart about the disease.  The first time I was diagnosed I was devastated.  But the second time I was not as shocked because I was educated.  The disease was familiar to me."

By learning about the disease, Madey said women are better equipped to converse with their doctors, get second opinions and decide what treatment options are right for them.  She also urges women to consult with their husbands about treatment options and allow them to have a role in the decision making process.

Finding a mentor who has had breast cancer is important, too. "I had a mentor who had also survived breast cancer," Madey said.  "She walked with me through every step of the way.  She checked on my mental state daily.  I knew I had one person who would be there for me and advocate for me.  She kept me in a positive state of mind.  She truly was an angel to me, a spiritual woman who gave me my positive outlook."

As for people who are offering support to someone battling this disease, Madey says take the focus off the breast cancer.

People mean well but can say the wrong things," she said.  "They want to find a common denominator by sharing a story about someone they knew who had the disease.  If the person died from the disease, don’t share that story.

I wanted people to be strong for me, not cry or show pity.  Knowing that they were concerned about me and were keeping me in their prayers was very helpful."

For Madey, it came down to one thing "how she [chose] to look at the disease.

You’ve got to get down on your knees and thank God for what you do have "not what you’ve lost."